Sunday, November 15, 2009


This is a tribute to non-inspiration. It sings of the unimaginative. In this hollow dullness I wonder if something will come. The wondering itself is blank and motionless. It is like a white wall. A clean-wiped chalkboard. It is like a pseudo-calm, which gives the brain rest from its mode of heightened creativity, that is, when it comes. But these are times when the tide is low and the waves are mere ripples. It is an overcast day without wind, rain, or sun. It is like a dreamless sleep. Its beauty rests in the contrast it gives to those times of ease in spilling out witty and eloquent thoughts onto the page. They gush all over the place. You think you will be able to go on writing this way forever, but then, the silence. It will only last for a little while. The canvas of mediocrity will again attract a color here and a texture there until it becomes a beautiful piece of art. Let's hear it for non-inspiration!

Monday, March 16, 2009

I read a quote in a book that went something like this: "Love is not finding the 'right' person, but rather being the right person."
Lord, how can I be the right person? Teach me to be such. What does this entail? I know it has much to do with selflessness and it has much to do with walking in the Spirit. I want to walk in the Spirit and not give place to the lusts of the flesh. I want to be filled up with love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, and goodness. Wow, what a list!
How can I love Matthew with all of my heart and soul? How can I diligently prepare to be a submissive wife to him and pursue faithfully the "office" of a true companion and lover? I love him and I want to be right for him. I don't want him to begrudge me or secretly hold bitterness because I have failed in some way. What is it that will keep us "glued" together? In the Scriptures it says that charity is the bond of perfectness. What is charity? Or I should just say "love." Love, according to the ESV, is that which is "patient and kind and is not arrogant. It does not insist on its own way and is not rude. It does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth." What is truth? God is truth. His Word is truth. The two great commandments have to do with love and truth. Love the Lord with all of your heart, and love your neighbor as yourself. Man, I seriously have a LONG way to go!
Only by grace can I accomplish this.